I feel this is an article I ought to write. I have spent many evenings and afternoons having a few drinks and talking with friends about the fear most people have of seeming arrogant, so instead, they err on the side of timidity.
I am talking about the difficulty the general population has when having to fill a self evaluation form or when asked during a job interview to describe their strengths. It is sad to see how most of you struggle on how to say why and how you are awesome. I have been shocked by this so much that I feel I must write this to try and help you. There is this notion that acknowledging self-worth is arrogant and impolite. Instead always smile and say "Well...umm...heee...you know I like to learn, and I work really hard..., but I am not sure about clear strength, you tell me." What is sad is that many people giving these weak answers are actually really good at what they do, and they know it! But they have this idea that expressing those feelings is wrong and arrogant.
The world is pretty small and the competition is huge. If you want to succeed you better start getting noticed. And no one gets noticed by saying "ummm....i mean if you think i can...i mean i'll try...."
Being arrogant is saying "man I'm freaking awesome" all the time and wearing a shirt with your picture on it. That's being arrogant. When asked why you think you are good; that's a different story!
Imagine a road ending in an electric fence. Imagine a sign on the fence that says "Trespassers will be deemed arrogant" in red bold letters. Most days you should stay behind the fence because being arrogant, like getting electrocuted, is bad and undesirable. However, when you are asked to describe your strengths, you should picture that fence opening up and a red velvet carpet unrolling beyond. You should picture white unicorns and flowers and trumpets, and yes a guiding breeze urging you to enter the sacred zone, because now it's ok. Now, you can shine.
It is of course important to know your strengths and weaknesses. Worse than being timid and unnoticed is to boast without backing it up. When asked to rate yourself 1 to 5, and you feel that in a certain area you deserve a 5. Give yourself a 5, after all you think you are worth it. When asked to explain the high mark, you should express the reasons with examples so that whomever is questioning it may be able to understand that you are not arrogant, but that you know yourself.
There will also be a time to name your weaknesses. And again many choke and think that this will be their doom. After all aren't weaknesses bad? Let me tell you a little secret. If you didn't have weaknesses they couldn't afford you, I am sure none of you get paid enough not to have weaknesses. Weaknesses are areas to grow into, and learn from. A good company should always help you overcome your weaknesses by coaching you and giving you the chance to learn. So don't be shy about pointing out weaknesses, you will always have some. Weaknesses point to us what we do not yet know, and we will never know everything.
So, please, if I ever have to interview you, and ask you to rate yourself, don't shy away. After all, I have already told you what to say.
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